The officially official Devuan Forum!

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

Miyo . . . you need to get a life . . . 

Last I checked, isn't he married... I recall seeing his youtube page once something about 26 years or something?

So that does seem ironic.

Although, I suppose different people have different ideas of what getting a life is.

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Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

This joke I have shamelessly copied from somewhere, forget where...

A blind man walks into a bar and a chair and desk.

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Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

A: Because it messes up the order in which people normally read text.
Q: Why is top-posting such a bad thing?

Thank Vikings for this!

xD

Last edited by zapper (2023-08-27 02:51:06)

---

Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

Joke:

Why did some people think devuan was going to die?

Because the name of its latest stable release!

Last edited by zapper (2023-08-27 17:21:54)

---

Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!

soren

Member

Registered: 2023-04-30

Posts: 59  

Re: The Joke Thread

Joke:

Why did some people think devuan was going to die?

Necause the name of its latest stable release!

I see what you did there, lol

sgage

Member

Registered: 2016-12-01

Posts: 338  

Re: The Joke Thread

sgage . . . having a bad day?

No worse than usual :-)

Ralph's joke brought to mind the Woody Allen 'sincerity' quip. The lightbulb joke was just a lightbulb joke. And everybody likes a good lawyer joke. When a family member of mine was going through law school, we collected quite a few...

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

Joke:

Why did some people think devuan was going to die?

Necause the name of its latest stable release!

I see what you did there, lol

---

Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

Here's an old one

Why would anyone have  ever used debian jessie I mean, would upgrading have made a difference? What would that be, but a stretch!

Old and irrelevant, but still amusing to me. xD

---

Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!

The-Amnesiac-Philosopher

Member

Registered: 2023-08-24

Posts: 5  

Re: The Joke Thread

A college football coach called his best two players into his office. The quarterback and fullback.

Coach: Okay guys, we're up for the National Title next week, and we can't win it without you!
           Unfortunately, you both are one test away from being on Academic Suspension.
           If you don't pass the next test, you both will be disqualified from being able to play for the Championship.
           Don't worry though, I've spoken with your English professor.
           We have arranged a test that you can pass with no problem!

So, he handed them the tests, told them to begin, and he left the room.

The test only had two questions.

1. What is your name?

Both players started writing.

2. Old MacDonald had a __________ .

The quarterback started writing, but the fullback was confused.

Fullback: Pssst! What's the answer to number 2?

Quarterback: You big dummy! It's farm! Old MacDonald had a farm.

Fullback: Oh yeah!

After a pause, he asked another question.

Fullback: Pssst! How do you spell farm?

Quarterback: You big dummy! It's spelled e-i-e-i-o!

zapper

Member

Registered: 2017-05-29

Posts: 665  

Re: The Joke Thread

Why did the coach find two quarterbacks in one day?

Because someone cut 50 cent in half!

Gory, but clever I thought?

---

Black Lives Matter!  I am white, but I prefer equality over hatred.
Haughtiness comes before a fall, pride before destruction.
Peace be with you!
No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and mammon!