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#51 2018-01-05 06:30:02

ralph.ronnquist
Administrator
From: Clifton Hill, Victoria, AUS
Registered: 2016-11-30
Posts: 221  

Re: The Joke Thread

There are two rules for success in life:

Rule 1: Don't tell people everything you know.

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#52 2018-01-05 06:59:25

fungus
Member
From: Any witch way
Registered: 2017-07-12
Posts: 497  
Website

Re: The Joke Thread

ralph.ronnquist wrote:

There are two rules for success in life:

Rule 1: Don't tell people everything you know.

That's the individualist's perspective of success.
Humanity has only evolved because humans tell what they know, eventually, somehow.  Imagine, just imagine, if this was an organized process to do tell everything we know to the most people we can, as quickly as possible.

Instead we get schools that restrict what we should know and half of it is garbage.

A fungus, as a single organism, that can extent for kilometers, can transmit "information" from end to end (cell to cell), in a non-hierarchical manner, at the speed of electricity.   And the same organism can live for thousands of years.  The wisdom of fungi!

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#53 2018-01-05 08:45:47

ralph.ronnquist
Administrator
From: Clifton Hill, Victoria, AUS
Registered: 2016-11-30
Posts: 221  

Re: The Joke Thread

Indeed. Lucky the bar isn't too high, though.

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#54 2018-01-07 06:42:06

MiyoLinux
Member
Registered: 2016-12-05
Posts: 631  

Re: The Joke Thread

There are 10 types of people in the world...

Those who understand binary and those who don't.


I have been Devuanated, and my practice in the art of Devuanism shall continue until my Devuanization is complete. Until then, I will strive to continue in my understanding of Devuanchology, Devuanprocity, and Devuanivity.

Veni, vidi, vici vdevuaned. I came, I saw, I Devuaned. wink

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#55 2018-01-08 00:33:14

fungus
Member
From: Any witch way
Registered: 2017-07-12
Posts: 497  
Website

Re: The Joke Thread

MiyoLinux wrote:

There are I0 types of people in the world...

Those who understand binary and those who don't.

Is this better?

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#56 2018-01-09 04:00:29

MiyoLinux
Member
Registered: 2016-12-05
Posts: 631  

Re: The Joke Thread

fungus wrote:
MiyoLinux wrote:

There are I0 types of people in the world...

Those who understand binary and those who don't.

Is this better?

Okay...but you asked for it...

Why do you never see a Hippopotamus hiding in a tree?

Because they're so good at it! tongue


I have been Devuanated, and my practice in the art of Devuanism shall continue until my Devuanization is complete. Until then, I will strive to continue in my understanding of Devuanchology, Devuanprocity, and Devuanivity.

Veni, vidi, vici vdevuaned. I came, I saw, I Devuaned. wink

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#57 2018-01-09 11:01:25

fungus
Member
From: Any witch way
Registered: 2017-07-12
Posts: 497  
Website

Re: The Joke Thread

How many psychoanalysts does it take to change a lightbulb?




None, the lightbulb needs to want to change itself.

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#58 2018-01-27 04:57:42

MiyoLinux
Member
Registered: 2016-12-05
Posts: 631  

Re: The Joke Thread

Two thirsty chemists walk into a bar. 

One chemist says to the bartender, "I'll have a glass of H2O". He drinks it down and is very satisfied. 

After seeing how happy the first chemist is, the other chemist says, "WOW! I'll have a glass of H2O too!" He drinks it down and is sent to the Emergency Room.

tongue


I have been Devuanated, and my practice in the art of Devuanism shall continue until my Devuanization is complete. Until then, I will strive to continue in my understanding of Devuanchology, Devuanprocity, and Devuanivity.

Veni, vidi, vici vdevuaned. I came, I saw, I Devuaned. wink

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#59 2018-01-27 20:16:45

zephyr
Member
From: Norman, Oklahoma USA
Registered: 2016-12-01
Posts: 107  
Website

Re: The Joke Thread

Took a moment to catch the joke, the bartender gave him what he asked for!

cool

cheers

z

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#60 2018-04-18 23:15:48

MiyoLinux
Member
Registered: 2016-12-05
Posts: 631  

Re: The Joke Thread

MiyoLinux Philosophizin'...

When contemplating this or that, always be aware that this may not correlate to that; therefore, that isn't necessarily this in the grand scheme of things...and at the end of the day, this and that don't matter, because in the realm of this, that is always speculative when compared to this.

...and you can quote me on this...or that.


I have been Devuanated, and my practice in the art of Devuanism shall continue until my Devuanization is complete. Until then, I will strive to continue in my understanding of Devuanchology, Devuanprocity, and Devuanivity.

Veni, vidi, vici vdevuaned. I came, I saw, I Devuaned. wink

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#61 2018-04-19 12:54:22

wdq
Member
Registered: 2018-03-15
Posts: 36  

Re: The Joke Thread

If no one knew how a blonde navigate on the internet the answer is really simple she pours water on the keyboard !


Hope the joke is not to dry big_smile

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#62 2018-04-19 16:30:06

golinux
Administrator
Registered: 2016-11-25
Posts: 1,098  

Re: The Joke Thread

Not too dry but a little sexist.  wink

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#63 2018-04-20 20:35:56

wdq
Member
Registered: 2018-03-15
Posts: 36  

Re: The Joke Thread

golinux wrote:

Not too dry but a little sexist.  wink

No intention for that the joke was on a website and sounded funny tongue

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#64 2018-05-14 02:27:15

figdev
Member
Registered: 2018-05-14
Posts: 68  

Re: The Joke Thread

a guy walks into a deli and sees a sign on the case that says:

ask us about our tuna!

he asks the guy behind the counter, "what about the tuna?"

the guy behind the counter says: "oh yeah-- its poison."

the customer says "if the tunas poison, why do you have a sign that says 'ask us about our tuna?'"

the guy behind the counter says: "sometimes i forget!"

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#65 2018-05-14 10:39:38

fungus
Member
From: Any witch way
Registered: 2017-07-12
Posts: 497  
Website

Re: The Joke Thread

Hey, I got a good one, I dedicate it to @greenjeans

A guy walks into a computer store
- He asks for a secure browser he can run noscript on
- The salesman says, I make the most secure browser, it is called palemoon, but you shouldn't run noscript on it as it causing instability with the browser and breaks some pages.
- But if I can't run the industry's leading script blocker on it why do you call it secure?
and the salesman says:
- Sometimes I forget!

Ok, I know, it is not very funny, it is actually not funny at all!

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#66 2018-05-14 11:09:14

figdev
Member
Registered: 2018-05-14
Posts: 68  

Re: The Joke Thread

its slightly funnier if you include the dialog though:

dialog

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#67 2018-05-14 12:21:59

Ron
Member
Registered: 2018-04-22
Posts: 92  

Re: The Joke Thread

I fail to see the joke. I have two other computers in the house and they are both still running NoScript in Pale Moon. All it takes is to untick the box.

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#68 2018-05-14 13:01:26

figdev
Member
Registered: 2018-05-14
Posts: 68  

Re: The Joke Thread

in that event, explaining the joke usually ruins the joke.

i actually dont think it does for this one, but i do think the debate would ruin the joke thread and im happy to discuss it somewhere else. i will say that if someone posts to a pale moon-related thread this week, i will find it, so theres no need to stray further from jokes on this thread. id be perfectly happy if this thread remained amusing.

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