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#426 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-10-06 00:40:28
Please stop full-post quoting.
Sir,
I'm not sure why you are wanting to extinguish the excitement that two old friends are experiencing after a few years of having no contact. After all, this is just a joke thread. I don't think using "full-post quoting" is going to cause anyone to have issues using Devuan...in a joke thread. If I'm wrong, please forgive me.
We are just two old guys...who have reconnected after a few years.
Take care.
#427 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-10-05 19:43:40
sgage wrote:Why did the chicken only cross halfway across the road?
She wanted to lay it on the line.'
Q: Why did the libertarian chicken cross the road?
A: None of your business, am I being detained?
MR. GREENJEANS!!! 
Man...how I've missed you! I hope you're okay man!
#428 Re: Hardware & System Configuration » [done][S] Keyboard-/trackpad-lock » 2023-10-05 19:35:30
If you want to turn the mousepad (trackpad) off completely, add this to your autostart file (as long as xserver-xorg-input-synaptics is installed)...
synclient TouchpadOff=1#429 Re: Hardware & System Configuration » [done][S] Keyboard-/trackpad-lock » 2023-10-05 19:25:16
I'm not sure what Desktop Environment or Window Manager you're using... 
On my window manager(s), if the package xserver-xorg-input-synaptics is installed (and added to your autostart), you can set it to NOT engage the mousepad WHILE TYPING and until a set number of seconds expires AFTER typing; such as...
syndaemon -i 1.0 -dIn the example above, the "1.0" equals one second. So, if you are typing on the keyboard, the mousepad is disabled WHILE TYPING and for one second AFTER you have finished typing. THAT is what I have in my autostart file. You can change that 1.0 to any number of seconds you desire.
Such as...
syndaemon -i 2.0 -d...for a two-second delay.
I'm not sure how to disable the keyboard...sorry.
EDITED: To clarify things that I didn't think of while typing the message and fix coding stuff. 
#430 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-09-29 22:04:25
I ate a kid's meal at McDonald's today.
His mom got really angry.
#431 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-09-28 17:41:27
I joined a dating site for arsonists, and they sent me a lot of matches.
#432 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-09-28 15:59:06
My wife asked if I had seen the dog bowl.
I said, "I didn't know he could."
#433 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-09-28 11:33:43
I wish to protest on behalf of the koalas. That was unbearable.
unbearable...
#434 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-09-27 22:12:21
Why aren't koalas actually considered to be bears?
Because they're unkoalafied.
#435 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-08-30 08:15:52
A college football coach called his best two players into his office. The quarterback and fullback.
Coach: Okay guys, we're up for the National Title next week, and we can't win it without you!
Unfortunately, you both are one test away from being on Academic Suspension.
If you don't pass the next test, you both will be disqualified from being able to play for the Championship.
Don't worry though, I've spoken with your English professor.
We have arranged a test that you can pass with no problem!
So, he handed them the tests, told them to begin, and he left the room.
The test only had two questions.
1. What is your name?
Both players started writing.
2. Old MacDonald had a __________ .
The quarterback started writing, but the fullback was confused.
Fullback: Pssst! What's the answer to number 2?
Quarterback: You big dummy! It's farm! Old MacDonald had a farm.
Fullback: Oh yeah!
After a pause, he asked another question.
Fullback: Pssst! How do you spell farm?
Quarterback: You big dummy! It's spelled e-i-e-i-o!
#436 Re: Off-topic » The Joke Thread » 2023-08-26 23:51:38
Q. What is a fake noodle called?
A. An impasta.
#437 Re: Off-topic » Music » 2023-08-26 23:38:42
"She Sheila" by The Producers
#438 Re: Other Issues » [SOLVED] "Powered by Devuan" icons? » 2023-08-24 18:54:04
tee-hee...
Just taking care of the folks that I love while I can...
#439 Re: Other Issues » [SOLVED] "Powered by Devuan" icons? » 2023-08-24 14:12:17
golinux...
he was going to choose
he wanted
his hands
.
golinux...
she was going to choose
she wanted
her hands
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